Why "Tricking" a Person with Dementia Usually Makes Things Worse

Full analysis

Teepa Snow, a dementia care specialist, argues that advice telling caregivers to "trick" a person with dementia into eating, bathing, or going to bed is both ineffective and disrespectful — because people living with dementia often sense when something is off, even if they can't articulate it. When a caregiver insists on a course of action despite resistance, it can erode trust and escalate conflict rather than resolve it.

Snow recommends a different approach she calls engagement strategies: first acknowledge what the person is reacting to, seek information about the holdup, and then be willing to adapt. In a concrete example she walks through, when someone refuses to eat a meal, the better move is to put the plate away, return later, and reintroduce it honestly — noting it looks a bit messy but smells and tastes good — rather than arguing about what the person asked for earlier. The core principle is that brain changes require the caregiver to stay flexible and curious in the moment, using their own intact cognition to support the person whose cognition is changing.